Wednesday, May 31, 2006

One big fiesta for illegal aliens and homosexuals.

Vernon Robinson is my new favorite politician. A black Republican with a gravelly voice, he's running for congress in North Carolina. To give you a feel for this guy's politics, when the Winston-Salem Journal slagged him by saying "Jesse Helms is back! And this time, he's black.", this guy took it up as a campaign slogan.

Archly conservative, Robinson's campaign pops out amazingly over-the-top ads that play on the fear that America's being overrun by dirty homosexuals and dirty Mexicans. Robinson's politics are quite the opposite of my own, and if I thought more about it, I'd probably find his commercials, or at least the thought that they're effective, depressing. As it is, I think his ads are amazing and hilarious, and I'd like to recommend two of them to you.

First, Brad Miller's Mariachi Party, a radio ad featuring fantastically racist use of mariachi music. The ad even brings in a canned audience to gasp in horror at what the liberals have done to our country. Oh, how they gasp!

Second, Twilight Zone, a television ad. A slide show that rattles off a laundry list of conservative complaints with manic energy, juxtaposing images of Osama Bin Laden with gay protestors' signs reading "God is a dike." Stick with it till the end for a fantastic slice of nostaligia.

I should stress that I find this guy's politics abhorrent. It's just that his commercials are so fucking good. He's kind of like a Republican Stephen Colbert. In fact, I think that we now face an arms race of ridiculous right wing propaganda between Irony and Pandering. And while I'm not sure which is funnier, I know that I'll be laughing all the way to the installation of a fascist Christian theocracy.

Ok, one more. In this radio ad, an illegal alien rapes a nun and then strangles her with her own rosary. As soon as the ad finishes that charming vignette, it launches into a complaint about how no McDonald's employees speak English any more. Nun-raping to observational humor in under 5 seconds.

Ok, ok, if I link this radio ad, then you can hear/see all of Robinson's ads without actually visiting his site. This way, you can just click the links I give you and suckle at his sweet, sweet bandwith. This ad is definitely the least of the bunch, being an extended riff approving of Bill Cosby telling black people to stop being so black. Fairly skippable, it does feature a quick dig at Jesse Jackson and a droll delivery of the line, "Yo dawg, peep my bling bling." Which is probably sample worthy.

Update! The Jesse Helms is back radio ad. Not that funny. Also, there may be copyright infringement in the tv ad. What's more, he apparently has a history of insinuating that his opponents in political races are gay.

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