Tuesday, November 01, 2005

My heart is cleft in twain

There's this girl I'm kinda fond of. She's all neat and cute and stuff, and we've had some slammin' times. But then this horrible thing happened.

It turns out that all the time we spent together, she was acting as a spy for a race of alien warmongers. Those bastards are trying to take over the world, and my chick helped them! What's worse is that she was always engaged to the commander of the space war fleet. Talk about yer double lives!

It makes me feel like such a chump. You know, normally I'd say that there are other fish in the sea, but the alien invaders have boiled away all of earth's oceans with their high powered galactic lasers. I guess I can take solace in the hope that I'll be bred off to create slave labor and a food supply for my new masters, but all I want is one more kiss from my girl.

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